I would not want to work for this guy, but knowing him, I probably wouldn’t even make it to my car leaving my house. ‘This guy’ being Kyle Wiens, and here is why: I am below average with grammar at best. Being a writer, it is one of my greatest downfalls–I know I look like an idiot putting a comma everywhere and choosing big words that definitely do not work where I put them, but we don’t talk about that. Wiens in his article “I Won’t Hire People Who Use Poor Grammar. Here’s Why”, isn’t a huge fan when it comes to messing around with grammar, which is why I am scared for his mental health and my own.
In school the one thing I always got the most points off on was my grammar, which probably isn’t hard to tell. I always wanted to write my way, but, and I think I’ve mentioned this before in another blog, the teachers did not love it. They wanted things their way, and while I did learn a lot on how to actually use words instead of just drawing the little ‘S’ on the corner of my notebook, I wasn’t happy about it. Anyways, the wrong and right of grammar.
See how badly that last sentence was put together? Well, welcome to my vocabulary. Grammar is still something I am slowly getting the hang of, and more times than not it doesn’t work the way I intended it to. I write how I speak, and that is where it all goes wrong. I, of course, find it the easiest way for me to communicate in any form–but the problem was when we had to grade other people based on theirs. It wasn’t pretty–thank god no one actually listened to me half of the time. Wiens definitely wouldn’t have. He’d probably burn in anger just looking at me.
This is because I relate more with the AAVE: African American Vernacular English. Zachary Martin in his article “AFRICAN AMERICAN LANGUAGE IS GOOD ENGLISH”, makes some really good points based around a more casual tone of speaking, where I just so happen to be a pro. In the area I grew up in, it was very common for the people around me to abbreviate their words, and I learn better in environments where I feel comfortable so it was no surprise that I picked up on a lot of their grammar. Wiens better cover his eyes for this next part–I use ‘ain’t’, ‘y’all’, ‘gotcha’, ‘gotta’, and plenty more on a daily basis more times than I can count.
It feels natural and so much easier, and technically speaking, all of the abbreviated words still mean exactly what the split words would. For example: I ain’t going dude. What words can replace ‘ain’t’? None other than ‘am not’. Same thing can go for ‘y’all’: you all. All those abbreviations do is just cut down the amount of words a person says, it’s not changing the entire theme of the essay or context of the conversation. I, for one, use them so much that I don’t even realize it half the time until I end up slipping on an email or something similar.
Which brings me to my final point, professional writing. No teacher likes creativity anymore. I’m entirely kidding, but it’s honestly kind of true. I mentioned it before with writing for school where I was just terrible with grammar, but that was in elementary school all the way to middle school at most. In high school I tried so hard to sound smart to the point where I’d actually do the complete opposite and make no sense, so I would call the trusty help of my friend and ask her to look it over for me–and it happened so many times to the point where I should’ve been paying her. Like I said I am slowly getting the hang of it now, on paper and computer.
Put me in a conversation where I had to use professional grammar and I would sound like a broken record with how much I would stutter. Okay, let me give myself more credit here: I work in a restaurant so of course I act a little more responsible when it comes to the actions of my words, but in some cases I still get caught slipping with cursing and other things that should definitely not be said to a customer. And the funny thing is that I only speak English so I can’t even blame my lack of correct grammar on being bilingual. I do try though–spoiler: it never works.
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